There’s this popular opinion in this part of the world that once you say to a woman, “I will marry you” then she automatically gives you the door to everything in her life. She suddenly become soft with you, and willing to allow you access every part of her life.
Well, while this may not be applicable to everyone women out there, it just a few that are not caught up in that cycle of absurd lifestyle. And this brings us to the issue at hand, the dangers involved in the way most women chose their life partners here.
Yes, he might love you and be all over you at the beginning, but what about tomorrow? That’s why I tell you that love is never enough, and will never be. Tomorrow, will be still cherish and value you like he did today? After the first pregnancy and you may have lost your sexy shape, will he still be all over you?
As a woman, you must always understand that the odds are always against you in a marriage. Yes, a man can easily move on with his life, leaving you with the kids and the entire responsibilities involved. He goes out, catching all manner of fun with other women, chasing his career, still building his future, and can easily get married to another woman.
But you, it is not always like that, because you do not have his kind of mind, you are always attached to your children, which is why you can’t possibly leave them behind and carry on with your life. You are tied down with the raising of the kids, whether alone or not, your career is eventually put on the hold, till only God knows when.
Getting married again is not easily available or an option on your menu, and while time equally waits for no one. Take a look at Nigerian singers, J’odie (famed for her song Kuchi’ Kuchi’), Soty (famed for her song Malaria) and Osinachi of Okwueme. These are great women in the music industry but bad marriage happened to them, and we all saw their predicaments.
For instance, Soty whose full name is Sotonye Horsfall, married a struggling man, who became the pillar of her downfall. A big name in the music industry in the mid 2000s, rubbing shoulders and sharing stages with great names in the industry. Along the line, same man she had wasted her earnings on left, citing she’s too old for him.
You can imagine that kind of story, for a big name like Soty. Yes, it is true you may not know the intentions of people in the beginning, but she too was just careless in the beginning and hence landed into such a big mess, such that she even became homeless. God forbid!
Imagine if she had married right, I’m sure she would have been such a great name in the industry till date. Now, the said husband has moved on with his life and fun, leaving her with their three kids to battle with. Her career permanently stagnated, depressed and frustrated. That’s what a bad marriage will do to you as a woman.
J’odie whose full name is Joy Eseoghene Odiete suffered similar fate in her own marriage. Left with a broken and shattered life after her marriage with David Nnaji collapsed following the birth of their son, Chinua, who is a child with special needs as he was born with cerebral palsy.
While the ex husband has moved on with his, not even bothered about what his ex wife is going through. She on her part is stagnated career and otherwise, even turning into a beggar just to be able to take care of her needs and her son. Just imagine what such a big name in the music industry has become as a result of bad marriage she got into.
And we all are aware of what happened to Osinachi Nwachukwu of the famous gospel song “Ekwueme”. How her husband allegedly maltreated her, and subjected her to all manner of domestic violence, leading up to her untimely death. What a bad marriage will do to you is beyond words.
Meanwhile, they are not the only cases out there, we have them in thousands, if not in millions. Women whose dreams, career, aspirations, pursuits, and lives are cut short because of the bad marriage they got into.
Women, always look beyond your feelings, emotions, societal and family pressure while chosing your life partner. Consider first, yourself, your life, protection, connection, growth, career and otherwise. The odds will always be against you in whatever situation that happens in that marriage, while the men easily vanishes and moves on with their lives!
Before you marry him, except you have made up your mind to be a full time housewife, else, ensure that your life, career and dreams are safe in his hands. Do not be a victim of his sweet and sugar coated tongue. Play your cards well, be wise and be strategic in your steps.
