Marriage is not a do or die pursuit or achievement in life…
Neither is marriage an ultimate achievement in the life of any woman…
Unfortunately we have seen an increased rate of domestic violence in many marriages in recent times, with some cases being as bad as subjecting a spouse to a holiday in hell, mostly coming from the male partners against their female partners.
Sadly, we have seen a lot of women die in the process, some survived with unforgettable physical and emotional scars and fears. Meanwhile, this wasn’t part of the beautiful vows on the altar or on their wedding day, but it ended up living in the homes of many couples in our society.
Meanwhile, many African parents, especially the mothers, are culpable in this act of wickedness. Yes, don’t be surprised coz we are gonna reveal how they become culprits as well. Many African parents are so conservative in thinking and otherwise, that they do not even see the danger inherent in their daughter’s abusive marriage, they see such as an experience that will come and go, and what will equally make a woman stronger.
This is no jokes, they are quick to preach for better for worse to their daughters whenever they ran to them with bitter complaints of domestic violence and other forms of maltreatment in their marriage. They are just too good in preaching to their girl children to endure, just endure, it will get better.
Let me tell you, for better for worse is not most of our African parents are projecting, no. First of all, this aphorism is not gender based, it applies to both parties in a marriage, and not the case were a woman is being subjected to hell and all forms of inhumane treatments in her marriage. While the man goes about with his life, unharmed, unhurt and no emotional trauma, etc.
For Better For Worse is just a situation were the couples endure through tough times in their marriage together; let’s say economic hardship, financial difficulties, health challenges, and other issues confronting the family generally and not one sided.
African parents should stop the habit of pushing their daughters into hell in the name of “for better for worse”. A man will pounce on your daughter as though he’s fighting the poverty in his lineage, with the last drop of his blood, inflicts severe wounds and injuries on your daughter.
Then if she runs to you for help, you end up convincing her to go back to the marriage simply because you want to please the world. Yes, so it won’t look like your daughter had a failed marriage or ran away from her marriage. Or maybe coz of the benefits you enjoy from your in-law, of which you are ready to trade your daughter for such useless benefits. Are you really okay?
Women, stop acting your parents scripts in such situations coz it’s your life that’s at stake and not theirs. Marriage is not and will never be the ultimate achievement in a woman’s life, if it must hunt your life then leave. For better for worse shouldn’t only apply when it’s about you, whereas your husband is only for “for better for better”.
Today he gives you red eyes, tomorrow black patches in the face, next is broken teeth or bloody mouth, and it goes on. And you are still there in the name of “for better for worse” and he will change soon. Aunty, any for better for worse that always excludes your man/husband is only pushing your closer to your grave, untimely. Don’t go about acting your parent’s scripts, especially your mother, that will ensure you remain in that marriage.
Be wise!
